My vow to my Romeo

Things have been quite overwhelming lately. Done with my second last semester and going through internship at a friendly place with great people around me, having my fiancé leave me at this place again, only this time, he left because he wants to finish up his degree and move on with the next phase in his life. 

If anyone knows me well, they would know that i am blogging again either because i'm bored, or it just so happens that i have something on my mind to share with the world. I've been so drown with the idea of getting over with the bachelor degree already that i forgot how much this place has affected my life. I met a whole bunch of awesome friends that i will never ever leave and forget for the rest of my life. I found my true love. I finally indulge in something that i love doing, being around people, reading them, knowing them and dealing with them. 

I'm not a cryptic person, nor am i a heartless bitch. I'm still trying to find out who i am and what i will be. But everytime i look at my left hand, it reminds me that there is a man out there, missing me, wishing i was there with him. I sound so mushy and irritatingly in love. Trust me, i'm just trying to get this off my system. If sharing my love story with the world is a crime, then i apologize. 

Ezuan has been great, lovely, the best thing that's ever happen to me. He's my fairytale. We have been through a lot together. Ups and downs, highest point in my life now and lowest that i was ever in. I know i'm only 24, I have a lot more to go through in life. Ezu brings out the best in me. He seems to be so ignorant and heartless at first, i said that because he never once was jealous of the many guy friends i had, i once thought he did not have the slightest romantic bone in him. Seemed to be a realist and thought that saying "I love you" may seem enough. I guess KL really did change him. (Thank God it wasn't me who tried to change him) 

Distance works for us, it taught him that loving someone is not just by saying I love you, but also showing the gesture of loving the person. He turned to be a perfect gentleman, took care of me as if i'm some brittle hearted little girl that he could not afford to hurt even one scratch. I finally found someone who could love me as me, not trying to change anything about me. Ezu would take a bullet for me, set aside his own life just to please mine, sacrifice everything in his power just to put a smile on my face. I am so fortunate, so blessed to have someone so perfect to walk along the whirlwind of my life. 

I have read numerous love stories from books, magazines, where ever it may be, i just hope and wish that my love story lasts a lifetime.

So, sweetheart, i vow to be the best person i can be, to cherish every single moment of our time together, be your strength when you need it, be the light that shines on you, always be there for you, come hell or high water and hope that our love may last a lifetime, eternally. Forever and always.

Amira Saryati Binti Misnu

Happy Anniversary

Happy 4th Anniversary to Me and Idzuan! :D

Thanks for the flowers love! :D

Thanks to Nadea, Emily and Ali for making this anniversary very much memorable!

<3 <3 <3

You know i'm one of a kind, there'll never be another me

Can't get me out of your mind?

You're lost in your own fantasy!

And when you look in my eyes

Is it hard for you to realize?

She'll never be me!

I've been off the grid lately. Hardly update my blog at all. I know i know I've been neglecting it like hell. Poor bloggy. It's okay love, i'll update you on a daily basis soon enough. Semester is almost over. This semester is not as good as before. I prefer last semester more.

It's the 3 years anniversary last September. It was awesome. Not magical but I'm not complaining. I miss Ezuan a lot nowadays. Kinda wish for him to be next to me 24/7, 365.

Speaking of which, Ezu told me about one of his friend, he dislikes her a lot and i wish so much to meet her so i can tell her off to her face. Mess with my fiancée, i'll hunt you down to the ground woman and i swear you'll wish you were never born.

Oh well, that's it for now i guess.

Baby baby baby ooo...

I MISS YOU!

33rd

When you watch a movie or listen to a song, it has this impact where it can influence your emotions for the moment. Lets say watching Gossip Girl. It makes me want to try to relate what happens in my daily life to what happens on screen. Can't deny that there is a side of me who wants my life to be like what's portrayed on the silver screen. Then again, no drama in reality happens that way. Well, that's what i think.

I watched the last episode of Gossip Girl season 3 last night. Only last night. I know it was out a long time ago. Due to busy schedule, i can't find the time to download. In the last episode Dan Humphrey and Blair were talking about signs in life. How the Empire State Building was to be the symbol of Chuck and Blair's relationship.

I had my own fair share of sign in relationship experience today. Not exactly relationship but perhaps friendship? I was suppose to meet up with one of my closest friends, but then, as expected, my friend bailed on me. Not that i was putting high hopes to see this friend, but it would be nice if a promise is kept. I'm tired of trying to make things happen. Right now I'll just wait for it to happen. If it doesn't, then that means it's not meant to be.

I was feeling very crestfallen (a new word i learn today. it means sad and disappointed. =P ). I don't think i deserve to be treated in such way. I was asking myself why i let my ancient feelings resurface. And just at the moment that i asked myself, a very very very familiar song played on Mix.FM. Guess what? Never Had A Dream Come True by S Club 7. Seriously? Can my mind be more obvious on playing tricks with my feelings? Goodness gracious me! Watching LBS just now, also made me reminisce about my past. The one thing that made me snap back to reality was when...

My fiancee called and said "Happy Anniversary baby!!!". Oh My God! I FORGOT ABOUT IT! This is the first time i actually forgot our monthsary. Then, i flew back to reality and thought of how awesome my fiancee is and to what extend he would jump the miles for me. There you go, 4 months ago, i address Ezu as my boyfriend or the Boyfriend, but now, he's no longer my boyfriend. He's my fiancee, my one true love. No matter how bad life drops on me, i know for a fact i will always have him. He's my savior, my knight in shining armor, my prince charming. No matter how my past drags me back, I know my future triumphs it all.

So here's some pieces on my number ONE puzzle. =)

So Ezu sayang,

Happy 33rd Monthsary Love

I love you so much Abg and i can't wait to spend my lifetime loving you.

I'm you Mea, i'm your Mira, your Kate and Katerina. I'm everything you want me to be.

See you when i see you, Love.

xoxo,

MK

2 years 4 months and counting!

Thinking about what the future has in stored for me. Missing the Boyfriend. And busy with work. The Sri-Lankan brother called me this afternoon. Goodness gracious i miss them both so much. I'll wait for the moment i'll be with them both again! =)

Happy 28th Monthsary my darling Love

I can't tell you how much i miss you. And thank god for technology, i found skype for Mac. Yeay... Skype-ing with the Boyfriend all the time now! YAY ME!

the One and Only,
Mea
xoxo

I want your love and all your lovers revenge!

I have much to update. A lot has been going on within these 2 weeks. Family matters, personal internal conflicts, everything. I've read all 3 editions of twilight saga e-book including the unpublished midnight sun,

Lets start off with family matters.

I've become closer with my cousins on my stepmom's side, like usual with the cousins on my late mom's side and drifted apart from my cousins on my dad's side. except for a few whom i treat like siblings. It's more comfortable being close with people who doesn't judge and accept you as you are, rather than people who tries so hard to change you. Note to daddy's family : I am what i am, if i am stupid in your eyes, then maybe i am not good enough for you. You think all of you are sooooooooooooo educated and religious, guess what, one of you cheated on your wife, and one of you dated ME when i was 15. Religious much? You think you're so superior? HAHA i'm laughing my ass off! Whatever man, one of you told your parents you dont go clubbing at all, guess what, i know you did. Be an angel in front of mummy, i don't give a damn. I'm just here to state that you no better than i am. I made mistakes yes, but you did more than i did. And you are judging me? Instead of befriending me and try to advice me, you became my enemy, WOW! ROFL! Whatever, thinking about this makes me angrier by the minute. My parents are back and our bond are getting better each day. I'm in better terms with my stepmum, I'm in excellent terms with my dad. So yea, Everything going on just okay.

Last week the Boyfriend was here with his family to meet mine. Everything went well and smooth. They came over to discuss our engagement. If all goes well, i might be the Boyfriend's fiancee in just a few months time. Wow, someone's fiancee, who knew this would come true. He's all i ever wanted, he's perfect. In every single way possible. He makes me laugh, makes me cry, he's the only person in the world who can make my heart beats faster and slower at the same time. He understands me beyond parallel universe. He's a very loving man, very careful, very kind and gentle, he's a man of every girl's dream. I can't think of anything negative of him. To sum it all up, he's HOT! Hehehehe.. I thank god for giving him to me. I'm sorry that i had to loose my friends to be with him, but guess what, those friends turn their backs on me, and he's still with me, so i think it is worth losing those friends to be with him. Not that i wanted it to be that way, sometimes i just wished that those people would just be happy for me and we can be friends again, i guess not.

As for personal internal conflict...

My new years resolution, I have a few in mind and i want it to be achievable. I might change myself a bit. Here and there. But i will still be me non the less. So yea, i think it's best for me to keep it to myself. =)

Love me or hate me,
xoxo

2 years, 2 months and counting...

Thanks baby.. For the flowers and for the cake, and also for the surprise advanced birthday bash on our monthsary! It makes me miss you more each day. I know my posts are gonna be emotional but hey, it's my blog! I still remember the old Ezuan i knew wayyyyy back in 2006. He wasn't as bubbly as now. He was the type to control his feelings and act all macho in front of people. Its a result of his heartbreak, but hey, everyone has to go through that stage in life. And then there was the Me-Dira-Danny-Ezuan era. We we best friends. Always the 4 of us together and that's where me and Ezuan got damn close. Now? It's been 2 years and 2 months since we first decided to be together. There are speed bumps along the way but we made it through. We lost friends too and gained new ones. It's life. Everything happens for a reason. Qada' and Qadar. Everything is already written. I may not be in a position to be all religious and stuff, but i am trying. I'm trying to leave everything behind. I had my fucked up shares of a teenage life and i think it's about time to let it go. It's about time for me to deal with things like an adult. It's about time that i get back on the right path, prepare myself to be a perfect wife with God's blessings.

Yea, you read it right. If it all goes well, I'd be married in 5 years time. Fingers crossed? Thanks! Insya'allah it will happen as planned. I am sure that i am in love, in love with the right person, in love with Mr. Right.

Anyways, It's been a good start to be back in Kuching. Surprisingly i'm awake at 5am everyday since 2 days back. I hope it continues on. I hope i start work Next week. Now that i'm back i miss my friends. I miss those people who drops an impact to my life.

For instance, I miss Jay! I miss her so much. Normally i'd go out with her, lunch? dinner? supper? All of it. I miss shopping with her and watching movies! And where there's Jay, usually there's Ellyss too! I miss that lil kid!

I miss Sedut!!!!!! I miss Tompoq!!!!!! I miss Hillie!!!!! I miss my housemates Fyza and Abby! I miss everyone! But it's okay. When the time comes, we'll be back together with new adventures to explore!

Cherrio, XOXO

You're old and you know it, but you know it's worth to grow up!

Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday to Ezuan,
Happy birthday to you!

Allah selamatkan kamu,
Allah selamatkan kamu,
Allah selamatkan Muhammad Idzuan Ismail,
Allah selamatkan kamu.

Baby Love,

It's your birthday today, and you're a year older now. Make sure that you are a year wiser. I know you made the right decisions for yourself and our future. Come what may, we'll face it together. You know I love you more than words can say! I miss you! hehehehehehe.. You take care there. We'll be together soon!

Lots of love from your girlfriend,
Ameara Sarayati

Every night in my dreams, i see you, i feel you

I've been missing you again. Yes you. My love, You're the strength that kept me going. You're the light in my dark and gloomy world. You can't imagine how much i am in love with you. I can't wait for the weekend when we'll be together again. I love that you love me for who i am. I love that you take very good care of me. I love that you call me names and it doesn't have to be the same everyday. I love how you call me sunshine. I love how you stroke my hair and smell it. I love how you choose outfits and stuff for me. I love everything about you! And for that i went over to see you!

Baby,

I appreciate everything you've done for me and for that i want you to know i love you dearly, more than words can say and definitely unconditionally.

Mea

Cherrio, XOXO

Trip to Kota Kinabalu!

I had an awesome trip to KK! Like AWESOME! Really really AWESOME! It's been 2 weeks since i didn't meet the boyfriend, finally, made up all the days i've missed him! Hehehehe..

So, morning of day one, i woke up at 5.30am at first and went back to sleep. Finally woke up at 6.45am. Got ready for the day out and left the house at 8.30am. SO EXCITED! Then the boyfriend picked me up and we "kidnapped" Anisah (the Boyfriend's cousin). Turns out, she is memang my type of girl! Hehehehehe.. We had fun okay. Like real fun! We hang out at Starbucks before heading over to Jega's place to pick him up. And then we had breakfast at come exclusive food court. Even the toilet has a garden! Heh! Then we sent Jega at Wisma Merdeka. The Boyfriend, myself and Anisah went to Philipines market to do some shopping! Bought a few bracelets and THHHHHHEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN...
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Off to meet the Mother-in-law-to-be! OMG! i can't tell you how much i was scared and nervous. I almost puked real bad! And then i finally get to meet her. We had lunch and ate Soto Daging. Been looking forward to eat Soto and Bakso. Ezuan's youngest brother is SOOOOOOOOO Cute!!! I feel like pinching his cheeks always. Go round again. And super fair. Hehehe.. After lunch we went to the Boyfriend's house and played piano, guitar heroes and nintendo Wii. So fun!!! That is when i got auditioned by Ezuan's Dad! He made me play the piano cuz he heard me playing before he came down to see me. Ezuan's got a really nice family. They're the family oriented type of people which is No.1 on my list as preference of "in-laws" and most of all "husband to be" and Ezuan is definitely like that.

Around 5pm we went to the airport to pick up Papa and Mummy and we went to Le Meridien where we stayed for 2 nights. The room was effing huge! And very very very comfortable. We went to Likas to see the sunset. Ate at Anjung Selera, and as usual, the Boyfriend finished the food! Hehehehehe.. Anisah was amazed of how much food was ordered and how few people were eating. She knows me better now, one step at a time. Hehehehe.. After that the Boyfriend, myself and Anisah went to Warisan Square where i bought a very nice dress. Tried Veda Blue ice cream and the chicken pie. Went to Pasar Malam to meet my mom and aunts. And after that i went back to the room.

Day one was awesome! I finally get to see Ezuan after 2 weeks being apart. This may sound cheeky and cheezy, but even after 2 years knowing each other, i still can't be apart from him more than a week. What more to say a month? I'd get crazy. Even last year's 3 months holiday, he'd come visit me every month. Once in Kuching and then once in Miri.

Day two he came around 9ish to see me. We had breakfast with my mom and aunts and then we head off to OneBorneo. We had the morning all to ourselves. Only then can he finally hug me and kiss me without worrying. He bought me slipper from Roxy, a bangle and bought me Pizza from Mario's. We went from top to bottom but not everywhere though. The Boyfriend finally got to try the boots he wanted so much! Hehehehe.. Adidas F50 Leo Messi edition. It was amazing that boots. After OneBorneo we went to pick up Dinesh and Anisah to meet up with Peechee and Chris at Little Italy. It was awesome, meeting up with the KK friends. Peechee was shocked to see me at first but he delt with it. Hehehehe.. Chris told me about his schedule as the driver of the family. Kesian!!!! Hehehehe.. I had Lagsana, and self made flavor pizza, and then bruchettas. Everyone was EFFING full! As usual, the Boyfriend had to finish the leftovers! Hehehehe.. Gave Peechee the drink i bought for him from Kuching. The drink it self is called Peachee! Hehehehe.. And then i learned something about KK guys, they are very very very aware of their surrounding. Hehehehe.. Ezuan, Jega, Chris and Peechee, they see girls pass by, start la they rate the girl.. from top to toe. Skali one of it they judge from afar. They say look so very hot. And then when she came closer and took off her glasses, Peechee said this "Dari jauh nampak macam 19 year old, dekat2 nampak macam mama 19 year old" Hahahahaha.. These boys are funny and i love them all! Thanks Peechee for the wonderful lunch!

After lunch we went over to Wisma Merdeka to just walk around and then to Centerpoint where i had my phone strap made and my necklace too. Thanks baby for the presents! I love you so much! Hehehehe.. I had Yoyo, which apparently is "the drink" to have when you're in KK. I had chocolate with chocolate pudding? Something like that. Hehehehe.. anyway, after yoyo we went to send Dinesh cuz he had to go back early to have dinner with his parents. We went to Pasar Malam again to meet up with my mom and the aunts after sending Dinesh. Baby Love bought me a new purse and i love it. I used it straight after he bought me. Hehehehe.. And i went back after the tiring day. Talked online with the Boyfriend again! I dont think i can ever have enough of him. I can't wait to marry him at this point. Hehehe..

And finally, day 3, the boyfriend came over at 8am to send me off. We went for breakfast and after that i packed a bit and Papa said to leave as soon as possible. I can't stand the sorrow in me to have to leave the Boyfriend again, i teared up in front of the hotel. But the Boyfriend said it's gonna be only for a few days and we'll see each other again in KL. And i'm counting on that. I left KK with tears in my eyes but i left my heart there, with him. I've been missing him again ever since. I'm glad that everything went well with the parents, on both sides. The Boyfriend and i have our promise rings already, all we are waiting for is to finish studies and then we can be together all the time. If everything goes well, i'll be Mrs Idzuan sooner than you think. *smiles*

Cherrio, XOXO

p/s : pictures have to wait until i get back to Kuching. I left the cable there! Heh...

You're still the one i want for life!

It hasn't been easy but at least i've stopped crying over not being with him. I've not been that productive here, doing nothing and enjoying the relax time at home. Lying on the bed or the couch, pampering myself. Don't worry tho, I've been eating healthy here. Doing some exercise. Not full ons but at least bits and pieces.

Baby love,

I might not be the perfect girlfriend, but i try my best to be the best. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me and I'd give up everything for you (if you look at it, i did give up half my life). I never regretted anything that happened. It had to happen cuz it was destined to. Nothing, NOONE can compare to you!

You're my light when it's dark,
You're my joy when times are bad,
You're my honey when things are bitter,
And when it's tasteless you make it sweeter.

You're my water when drought comes,
You're my air when i suffocate,
You're the ground that i live on,
You guard my always when i'm scared.

My darling Love,
I'd sacrifice the world for you,
Until the skies touches the ground,
My love will always be for you,
And only you!

With my undying love,
Ameara Sarayati.

Cherrio, XOXO

You're my no 1.

I've been off radar for a while now. I was sick and had a terrible sore throat. Too much to handle at one point. I was onlining for a while just now and i went thru Baby Love's friendster messages and i found the message i sent him 2 years back!

dun mind u ignore ba.. hehe.. im not important anyways. eh. chup.. wht sub u repeat again?
IdZuAn wrote:
> yeah true also i do act like that..sorry if i ignore u..
>
> M e a wrote:
> > betul la u dun eat people.. but then again.. u never talk to me bah.. u just look at me then u say hi. itu pun if u rajin then u tegur. haha..
> >
> >
> > IdZuAn wrote:
> > > apa juga mau d takut...i don eat people hahaha....
> > >
> > > M e a wrote:
> > > > owkie.. been seeing u around kan.. nak tego pun mcm takut2 bah.. haha..
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > IdZuAn wrote:
> > > > > hey mea..ya repeat lg tiga unit..of course we can be friends..
> > > > >
> > > > > M e a wrote:
> > > > > > hey idzuan. been seeing u around. jap. u foundation engineering ka? repeat paper? heh.. just wondering if we could be friends

Hahahaha.. It's just funny reminiscing how we got to be friends. But at least we have a funny story to tell our kids later on. "How i met your mother" It's gonna be hilarious. It's weird that i actually befriend my boyfriend before we get together. I normally just jump into a realtionship, but being with Ezuan is everything i can ever ask for. I'm blessed to say, i'm in love with my bestfriend. And spending all the time i can for and with him but still have time for my friends, it's miraculous. I guess i'm just lucky. =)

Van was talking to Dinesh about Godfathers while i was watching America's Next Top Model on Youtube. They called me off and ask me a question. "Mea, would you introduce your kids to Dinesh?" and i answered "No man, i teach my kid to bully Jega first then intro them!" and then Van said "You should make Jega their Godfather, then when they have money problem they'll ask Jega, not you!" hahahahaha.. True. But my kids will be screwed up if they know Jega too early. Still, loves him loads, you know i do Jega!

I don't know what else to write here and i'm very very tired. Until next time.

Cherrio, XOXO